Category: Uncategorized

Video – Dangers of the Job

Despite my recent spate of posts on teaching and education, I still want to use this blog as a platform for self-improvement as it relates to medicine.   I don’t know, yet, whether I will follow the path to paramedicine to the finish.  Teaching is occupying a fair amount of my time, so I will give priority to the things that seem most pressing.

Having said that, this video came across my social media feed last week and serves as a painful reminder that no matter how noble your job is, no matter how badly you want to help people, those very people you serve are also (sometimes) your greatest threat.  Crisis and trauma cause people to react in wildly different ways, and if you are not prepared for it, you could very easily fall victim to its chaos.

I have many medic and security friends who have their own horror stories from getting caught flat-footed on shift.  I’m glad to see agencies are seeking to remain proactive in arming medics with the tools and experience to protect themselves.

Remember, you’re no good to anybody if you are incapacitated, so watch your back.  That’s why the first step you are taught as a medic and responder is to mind your environment.  Constantly scan and re-assess for danger.  No one will look out for your well-being better than you.

Stay Safe,

Ryan

Blog – Reflections on my First Day (Teaching)

Last week, I taught my first class at college.  It was quite the experience to say the least.  Even now, I’m split between knowing that I did somewhere between “adequate” and “well,” and allowing the super self-critical side of me to autopsy the wreckage.

Wreckage is a gross overstatement because things weren’t *that* bad.  I’m mostly critical over some common themes.  First, I feel that the transitions between ideas could have used more intentional thought to make things smoother.  Second, the second half of my presentation was fairly slap-dash in construction and could have spent less time buried under procrastination as I prepped.  Finally, that my oration could have been better performed (read: slow down!).

The biggest observation was on just how exhausted I was when I finished.  There are a number of reasons why I was so drained by the end, all of them preventable in hindsight: I didn’t sleep well the night before, I hadn’t eaten food all day prior to starting class, I hadn’t consumed any caffeine like I normally would have, I wore a moderately heavy sport coat for the first half of the class on an already humid day, I’m very animated when I speak, and teaching just takes a lot out of you.  Only the last thing, I would say, is something I can’t control and will need to learn to manage.  Everything else, yup, that was my fault.  Next time, I’ll bring a lunch.

Those were the “bad” things.  Almost everything else about the experience was great.  I seemed to connect with the students.  I felt that I was able to convincingly show that the students should take these issues in philosophy seriously.  I feel like I earned their attention, despite it being a class from 1-4pm on a Friday.

Of the feedback I’ve received, students enjoyed my class and are looking forward to the rest of the term.  That may be because I did my job well, or it could be because they feel less pressured by the work of the course.  Time will tell on that front.

My final verdict for my first day of teaching is probably a B-.  I made a fair number of points and supported my claims with evidence.  The flow and presentation kept the audience entertained while sticking to a path that was clear to follow.  There is room to improve, in that this felt like a first draft and could use a few more rounds of editing for coherence and to remove repetition, but otherwise a solid entry into the gradebook.

Stay Awesome,

Ryan

Power Imbalance and Pedagogy

I had an idea for my class that online discussion postings that might be construed as uncivil could serve as a teachable moment in class to discuss and elaborate on.  My plan was not to shame or rebuke the students in front of the class, but to take it as a chance to reflect on the content of the idea and why it might be disrespectful to others.  I ran the idea by a colleague and she cautioned against it.  She pointed out that you never want to be seen as “picking on” a student or singling them out in front of their peers.

Then, I realized that I forgot about the power imbalance that exists between the student, the collection of students, and I when I stand at the head of the class.  Despite how I feel about whether I am truly a teacher, or if I’m closer to being their peer (compared to other teachers they encounter), I must remember that I am still their teacher.  I institutionally have more power; I stand in front of them as an authority.  I have power, whether I realize it or not.

Somewhere along the line, it was pointed out that picking on students picks them out from the amorphous mass that is your class and distances them from their peers.  They are free to stand themselves apart, but I cannot force them for the sake of a teachable moment.

Blog – Sound Pedagogy

Happy Labour Day Monday!  I hope you are all enjoying your long weekend.  My weekend has been jam-packed with course prep and dealing with a sudden surge of patrons at the bar as students move back into town to start the new school year.

I’ve learned to embrace the adage that “if you want to learn something, teach it.”  By this, I mean that there is no better way to learn and master a concept as when you must transmit that information to someone else in a way that makes sense to them.  Not only do you need to know the material inside and out, but you must also learn to fill in gaps as they arise.

At present, I’m trying to finish up my instructional plan for my course.  The first lesson is this coming Friday, and I’m both nervous and excited.  I’m nervous because I fear that I’ll be an inadequate teacher for this crop of mostly first-year students; that their introduction to philosophy will be botched by my inexperience and poor planning.  But I’m also excited, because I have some confidence in my skills, and it’s a new and exciting challenge that I want to face.

student

With less than a week to go, I have 27 students enrolled in my class.  When I look into their various programs, I get a wide range of learners, from science, recreation, business, IT, security, etc.  All of these faces are unique individuals who will need to sync with my lecture material.  My challenge is to teach philosophy to a class of college kids who probably are taking my course because it sounds interesting and they need breadth courses to graduate.  In other words, I need to pluck philosophy from the clouds and bring it down to the “real world” in a way that makes sense to them.  I can’t just stand at the front of the room and pontificate in their general direction.  I’ll need to be smarter than that if I have any hope of them passing the learning objectives.

Instead, I’ll need to engage them dialectically.  I’ll need to choose non-academic examples to connect their experience with.  I’ll need to prove to them that these questions and problems are not only relevant to them, but incredibly important to their lives; they need to take the material seriously.  In an age of constant distraction and competing media on their attention, I’ll need to come to class prepared every Friday afternoon to fight and earn their attention.

Talk about a tall order!

Oh, and because a lot of this material is stuff I wasn’t exposed to in school, I also have to teach myself the course material!

Oh well.  Here goes.

Stay Awesome,

Ryan

Blog – Time Keeps on Slippin’

I should be working on my course.

I know this to be true, and yet I find the days are sliding past.  I am now less than two weeks away from delivering my first class and I feel woefully underprepared.  Perhaps I lack the  context to understand how far along the development process I am.  After all, I’m not developing a course from scratch; the topics and weeks are already set, and the readings are all available.

That, however, seems like the easy part.  I still have to finish committing it to my instructional plan and I have to develop the lectures themselves.  The lectures are what worries me.  I can whip up writing prompts and messages to the students easily, but standing in front of the students for 3-hours is a harder thing to wing.  I have to be teacher, councilor, entertainer and authority for almost half of a working-day.  And I have to do it smoothly, as if I didn’t need to prepare.

There is always a struggle between Present-Me and Future-Me.  Present-Me tends to waste time as if Future-Me has an overabundance of free time at his disposal.  Present-Me is bogged down by poor sleeping habits, a full-time job, a part-time job, family and volunteer commitments, etc.  Future-Me lives in a time where all of these concerns have passed.

The trick is supposed to be that you have to realize that Future-Me has his own concerns to worry about; that Future-Me will be equally bogged down by work and scarce free time.  I understand all of this.

And yet, I find it hard to get myself pointed in the right direction for those 1-3 hour blocks of time where I’m not at a job.  The little bit of downtime that I plan to commit to mentally recharging and allow me to shift from one task to the next gets stretched out as akrasia takes over.  I know I shouldn’t click on that next YouTube link, but dammit I’m tired and it’ll only take a moment, THEN I’ll get to work.

That probably sounds familiar to you.

I don’t have a firm answer or cute wrap-up to this line of thinking.  I need to plan things better and stick with it.  I need to be mindful and intentional with how I spend my time.  More importantly, I need to be mindful of my limitations.  I work a full time and a part time job, so that will impact my energy levels.  I need to respect those limits if I wish to work around it.

Back to the grindstone.

Stay Awesome.

Ryan

Reflecting on Navigating Job Politics

In my attempt to make a career shift in the least risky way possible, I’ve had to expose myself to a bit of career politicking.  By this, I mean that in order for me to lay down the foundations of a future paramedic career, there are certain things I need to do now while also working to support myself.  I’ve read a few books recently that advise against diving head-first into your passion and instead build career capital that you can eventually cash-in when you decide to make the shift.  Cal Newport discusses in So Good They Can’t Ignore You how a person who is passionate for yoga should not quit their job to start a venture as a yoga instructor without first building a business foundation: getting certified as an instructor, gaining experience as an instructor, building a client-base, etc.  The idea is that you have to hustle on the side, until you can smoothly make the transition from one career to the next with minimal disruption to your income.  Larry Smith, in No Fears, No Excuses: What You Need To Do To Have A Great Career, takes a similar approach when he recommends researching and exploring your passions in a systematic, deliberate manner.

I’ve been largely following this attitude by reading widely on medicine, researching schools, taking the biology course to ensure I have the prerequisites to apply to school, etc.  Some of this I can do on my own, but some (like getting my boss to sign-off on an employee tuition discount for the biology course), requires me to share my plans with others.  This has lead to an interesting tension between my current opportunities and future options.

My boss knows that I have aspirations to go back to school.  In fact, she supports the effort.  However, this leaves her in a difficult position.  Because she knows there is a chance I will be resigning my job if I get accepted, she’s hesitant to expand my role at my job.  Even if this is a small chance (less than 3% based on admissions statistics), she does not want to increase the scope and responsibility of a job tailored to my strengths if she will then need to replace me down the line.  While I’m not saying this is a problem that should concern me, I empathize with her dilemma.  The job I currently have is unique at my place of employment.  To my knowledge, no one else has a job exactly as I do.  My job has evolved over the last three years based on my outcomes, skills and strengths.  In order to replace me, she would have to find someone that is essentially me, or have to dramatically change the nature of the job, which she’s not inclined to do because I’m currently solving problems for her that would then have to be addressed down the line.

I say all of this without the intention of making me sound more important than I am.  I know I’m not special, and I am easily replaceable.  What I’m saying is that this level of uncertainty in my boss’s mind about my future is also impacting the present opportunities extended to me.  Even if my boss doesn’t want to punish me for thinking about leaving (quite the opposite, my boss has been very supportive with the idea of me advancing my career within the College, including changing roles and growing into management levels), she nevertheless will think twice before updating my duties with more responsibility.

So far, I’ve been dealing with this by remaining transparent and keeping an open mind.  I assure them that I don’t have an intention to quit before I receive an acceptance.  If I am accepted into a program, then I will have to make the decision to carry on down the path, or stay where I am.  If I’m rejected from all the schools I apply to (again, each program is incredibly over-subscribed, with over 1000 applicants vying for 30 spots), then I will keep working at my job and reevaluate my plan.  I’ve also kept an eye out for further opportunities to improve myself, such as taking on a teaching job for the Fall to try it out.  If it works, there could be more avenues opening up for me.  If I discover that it’s not for me, then I’ll have a fun story to tell about the time I was a college professor.  But, the point to keep in mind is for me to be cautious and deliberate in how I move forward.  Otherwise, I’ll end up screwing myself over and closing doors that never needed to be slammed shut.

Stay Awesome,

Ryan

 

 

Education – Who do I want to be as a teacher

Before the summer break, I spoke briefly about being hired to teach a college class in the Fall.  On August 4th, I accepted my teaching contract for the Fall term, and thus set in stone the deal I hashed out with the Program Chair a few months back.  With this turn of events, you will probably see an increase in posts about teaching and pedagogy on this blog.  Fear not, I am still exploring the paramedic career, but I still firmly believe that even tangential experience will feed into making me a better medic.  I hope you find these digressions interesting and informative.

Having said that, I’m incredibly nervous about this new opportunity.  It’s a pretty big step for me and it will really test the idea of a patchwork work history.  Normally, people who come to teach will have a lot of career experience, or they have higher terminal degrees (specifically a PhD), and therefore are way smarter than me.  I got the job because of my eclectic work history and my attitude/perspective; or in other words, the Chair liked me.

Now that the contract is set, there’s no going back now.  I’m all-in to teach my first class (tentatively set for September 9th, but scheduling can be tricky at the post-secondary level).  This means it’s time for me to plan out my lessons and start visioning how the course will fit together.  Thankfully, I will not need to build the course from scratch; I will be able to start with the materials left by my predecessor (who, in a marvelous turn of events is a friend and former colleague of mine from grad school!).  Still, there is a lot of work to do on the course.

What also needs some work is to figure out what kind of teacher I want to be.  Here are some of the questions I’ve already started posing to myself:

  • What will my persona be?
  • What are my teaching values?
  • How much unpaid labour am I willing to give?
  • How flexible/inflexible do I wish to be?
  • What style of delivery will I use?
  • What is my power-point strategy?
  • What are my expectations on the experience/my students/the college?

I don’t have formal teaching experience, so I’m trying to figure out who I am and what I’m going to do on the fly.  There will be some wiggle room, a lot of mistakes, and some short opportunities to road test material.  But all-in-all, I’m driven to figure these things out because I’m scared that I’ll fail my students; that I will be inadequate.  Or worse yet, I was a poor choice to be put in front of the students.  I had the same worry in grad school – by me being here, I’m depriving someone else of the opportunity to do great things in their live and career.  It’s a game of trade-offs, only instead of me considering the trade-off between short term gratification and long term benefit, I would be trading-off my employment for the student’s long term success.  That’s a heavy thought weighing me down.

I know I’m not alone in these thoughts.  Plenty of people whom I look up to as teaching exemplars undoubtedly went through the same angst when they were first starting out.  The best thing for me is to act as a sponge and soak up as much wisdom as I can.

I stumbled across one such instance of someone who is wrestling with their teaching identity.  In a recent blog post entitled Radical Hope: A Teaching Manifesto from the Tattooed Professor, author Kevin Gannon opines on the values he wishes to uphold in order to be the best teacher he can.  The post is short and well worth a read.  There is plenty there he’s learned from experience that anyone can take away.  I’ll certainly be stealing some of his ideas to get me started on the right foot.

Stay Awesome,

Ryan

 

 

 

Progress Update

Given that it’s the summer and I’m on vacation from work, I thought I’d take it easy this week and post light with an update on my progress so far.

I successfully completed the biology preparatory course that gives me the pre-requisite credit to apply to most paramedic programs in the province.  I completed the course with a 93%, which I am more than happy with.  As a reward, I will be ordering myself this Littmann stethoscope.

https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B001NMT6N6/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pC_nS_ttl?_encoding=UTF8&colid=2EKDSURXLF25Q&coliid=I1JSPVHPYV8OI7&psc=1

My fitness progress has not been as successful.  Towards the end of my work contract (May-June), I had a lot on my plate, which I responded to by lowering fitness as a priority.  As a result, my weight-loss has stalled a bit, as has my strength in the gym.  I will be heading to Scotland this week for two weeks, which will keep me out of the gym for a little bit longer, but I’m hoping to make up for that with all the walking we will be doing as we visit.  My goal was to drop to 275lbs by the time I left for my trip, so we’ll say that goal has been busted (I’m currently sitting around 295-297lbs).

Otherwise, there is no other news to report on.  When I return, I’ll start trying to narrow down schools that I would like to apply to and ensure all of my supplementary application materials are in order.

Stay Awesome!

Ryan